New stories every week exploring neurodivergence and emotional processing.
SubscribeUnderstanding emotional blindness
Alexithymia is a condition characterized by difficulty identifying, understanding, and expressing emotions. It affects how people experience and communicate their inner world, often making emotional connection feel like navigating without a map.
Emotions feel like a foreign language I'm constantly trying to translate.
Alexithymia—from the Greek meaning "no words for emotions"—describes a difficulty in identifying, understanding, and expressing feelings. It's not that emotions don't exist; they're just harder to access and articulate.
Alexithymia exists on a spectrum. Some people experience it mildly, occasionally struggling to name their feelings during stressful times. Others live with it more intensely, finding emotional awareness consistently challenging throughout their lives.
It's important to understand that alexithymia isn't about being cold or uncaring. People with alexithymia often feel deeply—they just have difficulty recognizing and communicating those feelings. Emotions might manifest as physical sensations: a tight chest, stomach butterflies, or unexplained fatigue.
Imagine someone asks, "How do you feel about that?" and your mind goes blank. Not because you don't care, but because translating your internal state into words feels impossible. This is a common experience for those with alexithymia.
Many describe it as having a "feeling" but not knowing what it is—like trying to describe a color you've never seen. Others notice something is happening in their body but can't connect it to an emotion. A racing heart might just feel like "something physical" rather than anxiety or excitement.
Relationships can be particularly challenging. Partners may feel disconnected when emotional expressions don't come naturally. But with understanding and alternative communication strategies, meaningful connections are absolutely possible.
Alexithymia frequently co-occurs with autism, ADHD, and other neurodivergent conditions. Research suggests about 50% of autistic individuals also experience alexithymia, though it's important to note they are separate traits—not all autistic people have alexithymia, and not all people with alexithymia are autistic.
The overlap makes sense: both involve differences in processing and communicating internal experiences. Understanding this connection can help people make sense of their experiences and find community with others who share similar traits.
Experience alexithymia (Salminen et al., 1999)
Of autistic adults also have alexithymia (Kinnaird et al., 2019)
Have alexithymia vs 10% general population
Struggling to name what you're feeling, even when you know something is happening internally.
Often experiencing emotions as physical sensations without connecting them to feelings.
Having fewer words available to describe the nuances of emotional experiences.
Tendency to focus on external events rather than internal emotional states.
Understanding where you fall on the alexithymia spectrum
Tools for expressing yourself when words feel inadequate
For those supporting someone with alexithymia
Want to be notified when new resources are available?
Subscribe to updatesGet new articles on neurodivergence, emotional processing, and personal growth delivered to your inbox. No spam, just stories that matter.